What Does Your Coffee Say About You: A Literary Interpretation

Dark and strong- You enjoy life straight up just like your coffee because making altercations is unnecessary for the brave of heart. If these attributes appeal to your personal life mottos, you will probably find that a book like the autobiography Paddle Your Own Canoe: One Man’s Fundamentals For Delicious Living by Nick Offerman is right up your alley. This man is the embodiment of blatant manliness in a humorous sort of way and you do not even have to be a man to appreciate his incredibly straightforward manner, you just have to be a person who understands the greatness in intimidating someone with your unabashed honesty.  Enjoying this book also means you will immensely like him on the show Parks and Recreation, no one surpasses the woodsmen like strength of Ron Swanson. Since your tastes also tend to lean towards the realistic side of things another autobiographical tale to consider would be Lone Survivor: The Eyewitness Account of Operation Redwing and the Lost Heroes of Seal Team 10 by Marcus Luttrell, this book is a raw view into the realities of battle leaving no question as of to whether or not soldiers come out scarred by the violence of war. However, this tale also gives insight into the truthful beauty in human connection, which is to say that the bond between one another does not dissipate with death.


Sweet and creamy- Take a spoon full of sugar and drown it in some creamer, coffee should be as tasty as you want it to be.  No shame to be found in these connoisseurs of Coffeemate flavors, what’s wrong with enjoying the sweeter things in life? When it comes to reading the classics of Jane Austin and Emily Bronte defying society’s norms with beautiful stories since 1862. They endlessly highlight the redemptive aspects of humanity through the ultimate quest for love. Let us also not forget the profound literary works of Amy Poehler (Yes Please) and Mindy Kaling (Why not me?) these ladies are fierce and us comedy as power play. Now this description may lean towards the quote on quote more “lady like” spectrum of taste, but enjoying the sweeter things in life means seeing and appreciating the beauty in a happy ending or well placed situational humor. There is no gender specification on that.


Black with one cream and one sugar- You are a mesh between the extremes, only permitting yourself to take on doses of both one bit at a time. Black coffee is a little too much for your senses so you round it off with some creamer, but not going over board into the realms of a Starbucks drink.  Since you are the best of both worlds you most likely appreciate some duality in your literary choices, so look no further than Harry Potter by J.K Rowling. This epic series displays the full diversity of man; graying the lines between what is good versus evil, leaving us all with the sense that there is no tangible definition. The importance of friendship within the series is crystal clear as well as the emphasis on a universal family, but there is also the essence of mystery regarding mystical prophecies and extreme magical forces. These novels are pure greatness, but the movies are wonderful as well so they are a must see. Another series worth experiencing is obviously The Lord of the Rings by J.R.R. Tolkien the takes on the ultimate quest and forsakes the stereotypes of heroic characters to replace them with dynamic individuals. We are never lost in the eyes of Tolkien.


May your coffee choices be ever insightful.

–Morgan Crider

[Image sources: featured, 1, 2, & 3]

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